It's my 100th post! Can I get a prize or something?

Well.
Blog...

Hello Mr. White blog page.
Empty...
Waiting for me to fill this up with words.

Well, here we go!

This blog will most likely be pretty full.
Not necessarily word length like other ones, but....
Well, you'll see.

Keep reading!
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1st of all...
This is my 100th blog post!

Hooraaayyyy!!
That's probably not super super exciting to some people, but..
Hey. I did it!

100 posts. I think it's pretty much been a daily blog, and I don't think I've missed a large amount of days.
Probably a few, but not many.
So..

Yay!
100 posts, 100 days of my life.

So, to you who have been here since the beginning, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Seriously.
It...
Well, it means a lot if you're one of the people who check this site daily to read about my life.
It..........

It really means a lot to me.
So thank you (:

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Now.. Today.

Well.....

It was a very full day.

Very full.
A lot happened.

I'll start at the logical place.
About 3:28 in the afternoon!

Nah.
That was a joke.
It was funny, wasn't it?

Remember the time I told that funny joke about starting to talk about my day at a weird time that wasn't logical?
Haha.
Good times.

Now, seriously.

So, I woke up around... 9:30ish. Went back to sleep, then woke up at 10:30ish.
My dad and I went to the shooting range! First, we went and got breakfast at Vern's.

For those of you who don't know, Vern's is a little diner type thing.
My favorite cinnamon rolls.
Yum.
I got an omelette - Also, the word check thing is saying omelette is spelled wrong.
And it's bothering me! It's spelled correctly!
Gah.
That little red line is annoying as hell.

So anyway.
I got that delicious egg-y breakfast! Then we got a giant cinnamon roll to go.
Then we went down to the shooting range!
It was awesome. I haven't shot any firearm in a while, and it felt great to.. Shoot a gun, make holes in targets.
I really enjoyed it.

Especially now that the weather isn't freezing and windy constantly!
That was nice.

Our family isn't... The family that spends tons and tons of money on assault rifles that we'll never actually use.
We don't buy guns with massive clips because that.. Well it's a waste of money to get a gun, then go and shoot at nothing REALLY FAST.

Speaking of which, there were a few guys down at the range. They were...
Interesting.
They obviously.... Liked guns.
They came with full tactical bags with EVERYTHING.
Seriously. They were decked out with.. Military stuff.
Obviously, they had the civilian-legal versions of their assault rifles, but.. Damn.
They obviously had money to spare. They had tac lights, reflex sights, scopes, spotter scopes, magazines, cases, holsters, gun straps... They had everything.

It was cool, because I got to see the FS2000. It's the non-tactical version of the FN2000. It's a sick gun!
Bullpup, short gun.. It was awesome.

However.... The other side to this was....
They were.. Kind of... Tools.
You know the South Park episode about Harley Davidson bikers?

Yeah..
The guys at the range, at least a few of them, acted.. Kind of like the bikers.
One of them was VERY proud of the fact that he had a 45 round drum for his rifle..
He had fun firing it very quickly.

But he was obviously WAY too cool to use a target.
He shot at a big piece of metal about 15 yards away.
Can you imagine how much money he wasted? All those rounds, at a metal plate?
Seriously.

I think he thought that the MORE bullets he fired, the cooler he'd be!
It was annoying. Ohhh well.

Let's see..
Oh!
I got to shoot our SKS. It's... Related to the AK-47.
Same company, same 7.62 rounds.
It's a fun gun! Not very accurate, and it jams a lot, but.. It's fun to shoot.

Then, I shot our .223 rifle. That thing is FUN.
It's really accurate, and the recoil is almost nothing.
It was awesome.

That's the target I was aiming at.
It wasn't too bad, considering it was around 60 yards away. But, it was using a scoped rifle.
But...
I don't know.
I thought it was fun.
I had a couple almost-bulls eyes in there (:
It was fun to shoot.
I also ended up hitting a metal plate maybe.. 1 square foot wide at around 150-175 yards away.
I felt accomplished, especially because I had to adjust my aim when it got windy.

Nolan thinks he's a sniper!
So cute.

That was my day at the range!
It started out fantastically.

It was a good morning.

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Then I came home, and ate part of the giant cinnamon roll.
Yum.
I felt sick all day, but.... IT WAS SO GOOD.

Then I went to my room, and played some video games!
This is... Well this is when my day got... Not so good.

The long story short, I got home, and... I.. Well, I got hit by an emotional breakdown.
See, this is where I should have seen it coming.

Generally, I have anywhere from 1-5... Emotional or mental issues per week.
Anxiety attacks, panic attacks, mental breakdown, emotional breakdown...
I have a couple every week.
However, I hadn't had one all week, so I really should have seen it coming.

I won't go into details of what it really was about, but.. It was bad.
I mean, curl up in a corner and sob my eyes out bad.
It was not a good afternoon.
I spent maybe an hour or two in my room, crying, curling up in a little ball, and listening to music.
(It was really short! Only about 1 hour or so. I liked that it was shorter than 2 hours for once!).

But.. Yeah. It was intense. Like the circus (See what I did there?).

.....

Get it?
"Intense"
"In tents"
HAH.
It's a funny pun.
At least I thought it was.
Oh well.

ANYWAY.

So.. Yeah. Bad breakdown.
The thing is, when I have a mental and//or emotional breakdown, I..
Well, I really.. How do I describe it?
I can't seem to decide what to do.
If that makes sense.

I will text a couple friends that I trust, and tell them something is wrong.
But the second they ask what's wrong, I'll tell them I'm fine, that I shouldn't talk to them.

So, if you're one of those people that I did that to.. It wasn't on purpose.
It's not because I don't trust you.
It's because.... Well, my thinking gets messed up when I'm in that place.
When I'm in that situation, I.. I don't know.
It's so hard to explain what I feel!
I mean, if you've had attacks like this, if you struggle with this like I do.. You know exactly what I mean.
It's so hard to explain to people.
But..
Yeah.

That's where I was for a while. I couldn't decide if I needed to talk it out, or if I needed to be alone.
I... Well, I shut out about 4 people who were there to talk to me.
I don't regret it, because I ended up avoiding giving them unneeded stress.
I'm okay with that.
There were a couple people that I kept talking to though.

I've mentioned before that when I'm emotional, I either need to be around a guy, or I need to be around a girl.
Today, I really was not sure what to do.
I texted a few different people, asking if I could be around them just for a little bit.
Some people were busy, and I was fine with that! People have lives. I'm not the center of anyone's life.
Just to reiterate, I never have a problem with people being busy!
I mean.. It's stupid to get pissed because someone else is busy. I don't do that..
So anyway. I was fine with my friends being busy.

So, I talked to a few different people.
I ended up talking to my friend Cooper.
For those of you who don't know..

He's.. Well, he's one of the few people that I regard as a brother.
I mean, I think I call maybe 3 guys 'bro' seriously.
Cooper is definitely one of them.
I love that kid to death.

We've been friends since 5th grade, when he shadowed me at our school.
I... Well, I think Cooper is one of the....
1, 2, 3, ...... Maybe 4 people that I've never ever had a problem with, that I've never been in an argument with.
To me, that's awesome. He's... Yeah. He's a great guy.
It sucks not being in the same class as him. Seriously. He was one of the reasons I lived through high school.

So yeah. I called him up, and we went down to the Coyote Ridge trailhead, and walked up and down the trail for maybe an hour or so. It was fantastic.
I felt great.
...... Great-ish.

It was awesome! I mean, I love being able to just walk around and make stupid jokes with him.
It really helped relax me.
I mean, just driving there, I started crying 2 or 3 times again.
It was bad!
But.. Well, I felt better when I was hanging out with him.
It was nice.

So, that's... That's that. We hung out, we talked, we made stupid jokes, we walked around in the sun... It was awesome. It was definitely needed.
Some BRO time.
We made fun of tools. And people with Tapout shirts who think they're badasses.
Hah. Tools.
They make me laugh.

We also discussed how it bothered us that douchebags tend to be able to pick up and start a conversation with a girl easily.
Seriously! I can't figure out how the hell they do it!
I'm not saying that if you can start a conversation with a stranger you're a tool!
No no no. That's not what I mean.
I'm saying... Well... You know what I mean, right?

Why am I asking you?
You can't generally respond to this.
Anyway.
I'm saying, there are douchebags out there that are so CONFIDENT of their ability to get into a girl's pants that they can start a conversation easily.
Again, I'm not saying if you have self-confidence you're a tool.

It's just..
Gah. If you get it, you get it!
If you know what I'm talking about, you'll understand.

If you don't...

Well...

Here's a bear on a tricycle!

WHAT AN EFFICIENT AND EFFECTIVE DISTRACTION FROM MY ORIGINAL TOPIC!

Yup!

Hanging out with Cooper definitely was awesome.

Then I went home!

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Ta-da! That little break of 20 dashes means time has passed.

So now I'm in my home again.

The rest of my day was..

Not sure.

It's kind of all a blur.

I stayed home, I played video games.

I... 

I sat and played video games, and talked with friends to keep myself distracted from my own head. 

You know that feeling?

Why do I keep asking if you understand ._.

It's probably because I write these blogs as if I'm talking to someone. 

So don't worry about responding.
It's all good!
Don't try and write a reply on the screen.
Kinda might mess it up. 

But if you do, put a video up so I can laugh!

Uhh.. Where was I.

Oh right. At home, playing games.

It was fun!

Played some League of Legends.

I REALLY am into jungling now.

My friend Ian got me addicted to it. 

I'm kind of... Jungling with ALL the champions!

I ALMOST got jungle Karthus to work.

For those of you who understand that, IT'S FUNNY.

Can you imagine the moment he turns 6, yet no one knows it?

"Oh look a small gank by someone and- OH GOD GIANT WALL! OH GOD REQUIEM!"

Hahahahahaha.

I thought that was funny.

It's funny if you get it.

I also tried out jungle Akali today. 

It worked REALLY well!

But... I was counter-jungled by LEE SIN THE BLIND MONK.

I swear LEE SIN THE BLIND MONK has the best counter-jungle. Seriously.

He ripped me to shreds. And it didn't help that THEIR Akali got fed.

I... died a lot. We also had no tank.

So.. LEE SIN THE BLIND MONK kept killing me.

If you don't understand why I keep saying LEE SIN THE BLIND MONK, you'd need to have seen the video that featured him the week he was released.. Funny stuff.

Anyway. Nerd speak is over.

Back to my life.

Basically, I sat around and played video games.

All the while, my emotions were all...

Wonky.

Weird.

All over the place.

My emotions kind of felt like this today.

Hahaha.

Jack Sparrow.

Hahahahaha.

Those made me happy.

I keep distracting myself. 

AND THAT'S JUST FINE.

I love being distrac- 

O.O

SOMETHING IS SHINY.

....

....

....

I wish I was kidding.

I really did just dive across my floor to find something shiny.

However, it was just a piece of foil.

Grumble.

Anyway.

I like being distracted.

Back to my life, again.

Uhh.. Yeah!

Video games, emotional turmoil, talking with people.

I found a couple people that I need to talk with more. They both made me very happy (:

One of them made me laugh so hard.

I was talking to her, and I was explaining how my emotions are all.. Weird.

I was saying that my mood has been swinging all day, and I felt fragile and unstable. My mood was ALL over the place ALL day.

She responded with..

"I've been pretty good :) gosh I'm sorry. I totally know the feeling but that's cuz I have a uterus lol."

It made me laugh so hard.

I thought it was just hysterical.

I still do.

Bahaha.

Let's see.

Oh!

She also said that I was "Cute and easy to talk to."

That made my day.

It really did.

I... Well, I love feeling like I'm... Attractive.

I know, everyone loves that feeling. But..

I guess... Well my self-confidence is kind of...... Non-existent. 

So it really makes my day when a girl compliments me.

It... It really does.

I try to be attractive, and I try to be a guy that people will like, so...

It really helps when someone acknowledges that. You know?

.....

I just asked you if you know what I'm saying.

Again.

I'm a strange person.

._.

She made me smile. 

We texted and talked some more, then I went to the movies.

We were having a very fun conversation before I went to the movies!

We had to end it because the movie started :(

The movie was at 10:25, and it got out around 12:30.

It was John Carter.

And...

Damn. It was REALLY GOOD.

Keep in mind, I don't watch a movie like a critic. I don't analyze the movie.

I watch the movie to... Watch a movie. Escape life, watch something happening, be drawn into the plot, see some explosions and fight scenes!

So I really liked it. A lot.

Very much so.

I intend on buying it.

It also kind of... Played with my emotions a little.

The later in the day it gets, the more unstable I become.

Take now, for instance.

I'm in an emotionally fragile state.

However, I'm feeling decent, because I'm devoting 99% of my entire being into keeping myself smiling.

I think I've explained it before, but I.. I don't fight to get out of depression much.

I'm so used to it that I don't bother trying to fix it.

That's something I'm working on though!

But back to the movie.

It was awesome.

Very... Action-y.

But I think it was emotionally.... Interesting?
Captivating!

It was emotionally captivating. To me, at least. 

And...
Well, this is where I'm starting to get emotional.

The thing is..

Sigh.

I don't know how to say it. So I might as well just... Ramble on. 

Basically, I.....

Well..

Ugh. I don't know how to approach this.

I'll rush it. Like Riven should rush a Bloodthirster (League of Legends joke!).

So. 

I... 

Well.....

UUGGGHH. I feel weird saying this.

I've only ever mentioned this type of thing to one person before, so I feel weird admitting it to the internet.

If I had to pick one thing that I want to be in life.....

..

..

This sounds silly, but...

Well, I....

I want to be some girl's prince.

I know, it's.... Stupid sounding.

But...

I want to be the prince that she waits for, the prince she longs to see.

I want to be the hero that comes and takes her away from the evil in her life.
I want to fight a dragon to save her, I want to valiantly climb a tower to save her.

God....

I'm so weird. I'm so emotional!

But...

It's true!

I.... I just.. I want to be a prince with a princess. 

Sigh...

I'm so... Girly. 

Haha.

But it's true. I want to save her, I want to carry her into the sunset..

I want to be a knight in shining armor.

I..

I want to be the hero in a story.

I want to fight away the villains, I want to duel the "bad guy" to save her...

John Carter messed with my head!

He ended up being the prince and saving the princess...

And...

I want that. 

I want to be the good guy in the story.

I really do.

...............

Well, that was more than I intended on saying.

It would be silly of me to go back and delete it, after I got the courage to write it.

Interesting.. I somehow feel more comfortable writing that in a blog than saying it to someone's face.

I guess it's because it's.. Well, I don't have to worry about seeing their response.

This way, people could laugh and call me a sissy, but I wouldn't know it!

I like that.

So.. Yeah.

That was me.

You got a little insight into how Nolan's brain interprets movies and fairy tales.

I'm...

Well, I'm a very very emotional person.

Hahahahaha.
I was just waiting to put that in my blog.
I love that face.

But yes, it's true.
I'm emotional and.. I have very silly emotional quirks.

So there you go. You got to hear me talk a little about me wanting to be a prince in a fairy tale!

Cross that one off your bucket list.

I found a guy who will let me record drum covers on his set and using his mics!
I already told you that sometime..
Well, I'm excited to do that.

I even have a playlist that I'm constantly listening to of different songs I'm going to play!
I'm excited.

I think that's enough for one night // early morning.

I'm proud of myself!
I just wrote a little paragraph about something, but I realized it was making me upset, so I deleted it.

I can't believe I'm so proud of myself for that.
But it's true. I was upset because of something, so I stopped thinking about it!

The little things make me proud of myself.

-------------------- 

So I just went and breezed through my blog for the night.

1. Damn, this blog is longer than I thought it was going to be.

2. I REALLY REALLY like the "enter" key. Seriously. I press enter after pretty much every sentence. But I have a good reason! It's because I hate reading blogs that are ONE MASSIVE PARAGRAPH.
So I separate my thoughts so it's easier to read.

I hope it's easier, at least.

That is most definitely my blog for the night // morning!

I wrote a lot.
It was also all over the place.

Right now, my emotions are starting to.. Go down the tubes.
But I won't let that happen!
I will watch funny things and laugh at stupid jokes until I fall asleep!
I'm not going to let myself go to sleep upset. Not this time.

Good night everybody (:

Or good morning.
Whichever one works for you!

So once again, thank you for reading!
This was my 100th post, and I will be here all week.
All year.

Pretty much forever. So expect to read my blogs until the day I die.
They'll probably get more and more.... Insane.
Or strange.
Or boring!

I'm not sure.
But I'm done now!
I'm going to watch funny videos.

Good night // good morning!
Again, I'm not going to do the "Daily" stuff, because it's still spring break, and I'm too lazy right now.
But I shall leave you with a question! Again!

If you could live in any movie universe, which would you choose?

As usual, I'm going to say "leave the answer in the comments!"

Nobody ever answers, but hey!

I figure someone will eventually.

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So comment down below, or share this post with your friends!

Tell someone about it, write about it, share it, blog about it!

That reminds me.. If you have a blog, give me the address, and I'll add it to the fancy 'blog list' down at the bottom of this page!
I read peoples' blogs daily, so I would love more to add to my list!

Thanks for reading everybody (:

-Nolan