Guys - Not As Confident As We Seem

Well, I have 5 really big topics that I'm going to blog about this week.
I don't really know which one I want to start with, so I'm just going to have a friend pick a number between 1 and 5, and that's what I'll blog about.
..
..
..
And the winner is, "my take on the media's effect on self-image in a guy" .

Huh.
Well, I'll do my best.

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So before I start, I need to make it clear that, to really make this a personal blog, I don't look up other people's opinions and take mine from theirs.
This is 100% my opinion and my thoughts.
The only type of research I would do would be for strictly objective information.

Yeah.

Read on.

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In case you haven't realized, I don't plan anything on these blogs really.
I just kind of..
Decide my topic, then start rambling.

So, like all my recent posts, I don't know where I'll be going with this one.
I put it on my list because I feel like it's something that people need to hear about.

We all know that society and the media emphasizes unrealistic expectations and goals for the female form.
When we talk about self-image, most of the time, it talks about women and society's emphasis on sexuality rather than beauty.
I'm not saying that's not true, I'm just saying that media messes with guys as well.

I'll start simple.
Commercials for anything.
The guys are attractive, well-dressed and in shape.
Those are just normal commercials, not particularly confusing or anything.

For workout products, the men are already in perfect shape.
Abs, pecs, biceps, triceps, upper and lower back..
Basically every single visual muscle is toned and defined.
Working out is easy for them. They can lift weights, do pushups endlessly, flex and bulge their muscles.. They're always in shape.

Even beer or car commercials can do that.
In a beer commercial, the men are always:
Chugging beer, but not drunk.
They always have beautiful women by their side.

In a car commercial, the men:
Are attractive.
Well dressed.
Rich.
But they maintain their composure, even while cruising around 100 miles per hour on a road along the coast.

Like I said, I'm pretty sure women's pressure from society is worse.
But...
It still sucks for guys.

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"1,204 women responded to the survey, answering a similar question, "which of the following celebrity body parts do you consider most perfect?". Here are the results below:

Face - Johnny Depp - 61%
Hair - David Beckham - 42%
Chest - Daniel Craig - 38%
Shoulders - Taylor Lautner - 31%
Arms - Rafael Nadal - 63%
Abs - Ryan Reynolds - 54%
Legs - Frank Lampard - 32%

When asked, "what is more important to you?", 52% of men said they thought muscle size mattered more, compared to 37% that said they would prefer to be lean. 69% of women said they preferred leaner male physiques to bulkier physiques."


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I found that kind of interesting, to be honest.
It kind of hurts knowing that I'll never really measure up to a majority of women's "ideal man".

Each gender kind of decides what they think is the perfect body.
They decide for themselves what the other gender prefers, based on the media's common portrayal of their own gender.

This isn't really a topic I'm very passionate about, so it won't be that long of a post.
I'm not in a very good mood either, so it's kind of effecting my writing right now.


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The point I'm trying to reach is that girl's aren't the only ones pressured by society.
In movies and commercials, the second a guy pulls his shirt off, every girl in the room looks at him.
Everyone acknowledges that the man is super-hot and sexy.
Frankly, that's not really the case.

When I take off my shirt to go swimming, I really don't get any second glances.
I'm not particularly attractive any way, but my body is less than stunning.
Kind of pathetic to be honest.

I definitely have changed a lot of myself in order to be more attractive.
I'm eating food that others consider to be small portions, but I consider to be a massive meal.
Yesterday, I had 2 waffles for breakfast, a bowl of ramen for lunch, and a quesadilla for dinner.
I went to Taco Bell with my friend last night when I got the quesadilla, and I mentioned the food I had eaten all day. She was shocked at how "little" the food was.
Does that really seem small?
I think that's a massive amount of food for a day.
Usually I try to have 1 to 2 meals a day.

I want to change my body.
I want to be attractive.
Not just my body, but my face.
But without surgery, I'm pretty much stuck with what I've been given.

Like the study above, I want to have an attractive face.
61% of women preferred Johnny Depp's face.
I don't really think I have a chance at getting that.
I don't think any guys really do.
The body parts that women preferred are really, really difficult to actually obtain.
You can't just get more attractive over night.
It's not that easy.

I hate to break it to you, but not every guy has a great smile.
Not all of us have perfectly clear skin.
We don't look good in every single set of clothing we own.
We always hear that guys can get ready in about 10 minutes.
While this is true, we are capable of putting a few hours or more into our appearance, but people won't notice.
In other words, when we make a huge effort to look better, people won't generally notice that we look different.

Guys want to attract girls.
I'll admit this huge secret (that I'm pretty sure everyone already knows).
I think that's why guys often hate people like Taylor Lautner.
I don't hate him.
I make fun of him, but I don't hate him.

But so many guys do.
Frankly, I think it's because most guys are jealous.
No, we won't generally admit that.

Think about it.
If you ask a guy why he hates Taylor Lautner, a common response will be "Well, I'm not jealous of him!"
I honestly think that a majority of guys are simply jealous because he gets girls easily.
He probably works hard for that body, but it still seems unfair to most guys.
Let's face it.
Even if we try really hard, it's still pretty hard to get a body that defined or muscular.

Every guy wants to be hot.
But lots of girls will comment and say that body isn't everything, that sensitivity is more important.
I know that lots of girls will say that.
But the truth is, body is a big factor for most women.
Definitely not all women, but a large portion of women want a muscular and slender man.

However, society sells men workout machines and stuff to make ourselves purely muscular.
Lots of guys just assume that bigger muscles = more women
Obviously not the case, but that's what society tell us, so we follow along.

For the 13249th time, I need to make sure that you, the reader, understands that I don't claim that men have it worse than women.
But I want to make it clear that it really can affect a guy's self-image negatively, depending on who he is.

For example, me.
I hate my body.
I loathe my body.
I don't feel comfortable in my own skin.
I would kill for Ryan Reynolds' body.
I wish I was as attractive as most famous men.

I wish I could attract women just by smiling.
The truth is, I can't.
I'm not that lucky.
I just don't have the right body for it.
Unless I'm willing to devote tons of time each week just to working out and focusing on my body, I'll be stuck looking like this.
I definitely work out a little bit, so I can just kind of lose a little fat and gain a little muscle, but it's not so important to me that I want to start a massive workout routine each day.

Guys want to be attractive, muscular, smart, sexy, funny, and sensitive.
It's hard to get all of those.
We generally have one of those traits.
We're not born with everything.

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Guys, if you feel like you're not attractive, if you feel ugly, I'm sorry.

It sucks. It makes you feel like shit.

When you're watching a movie with your girl,and you see a hot guy come on screen, it makes you feel out of place, jealous.
You wish you could get that kind of look from her, but you know you can't.
(This is how I feel, but not every single guy feels that way.. But I'm sure quite of few of you do).

Society tells us how we should look, and we listen.
We can even look at it as a challenge.
"This is how I should look. I'm a man. I can get to that point. I just have to work out every day."
We're not man enough unless we work out enough to get a super-sexy body.

Admit it. You feel jealous when you see another hot guy.
You hate it when you see another guy getting attention from every girl that walks by, just because he has abs that you don't have.
Just because his hair is perfect, just because his smile is dazzling.

We like to think that they don't actually work for it.
We assume that they were born that way.
Most guys aren't. They've probably devoted time and effort every day, just to get those abs.
Maybe they even got their hair cut because they wanted it differently to attract girls.

I'm working on my weight and body in a kind of unhealthy way.
I'm avoiding eating.
But working out, even just burning off calories, can slowly help your body.
I'm looking to start swimming again.
It got me into the best shape of my life, and I intend to go back to that.

So...
Work at it.
Don't just sit back and be jealous.
It's hard not to be jealous. Believe me. I know.
I'm a guy too.
In case you weren't sure.


I guarantee that if you work hard, you can at least improve your situation.
The harder you work, the better body you'll get.
You can't just wait and hope it goes away.
(Except for some of you. You lucky guys that lose fat without trying. You don't count).
It's just a matter of how much you want it.
If it's really that important to you, work for it. 

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Now, for the ladies.

Us guys... We're insecure.
You aren't the only ones who feel upset about your body.

1 in 20 young people can have an eating disorder.
Surprisingly, 15% of them are men.
Still a minority, but that number is rising.
More and more of us are feeling worse about ourselves.

WE can feel insecure about our bodies.
Anorexia in men is slowly becoming more and more commonplace.
We want to change our bodies, we want to be sexy.

Here are just a few things we hate.

We hate admitting when we're upset.
We hate admitting we have emotions.
We hate admitting we want to change ourselves.
We hate admitting we don't like our bodies.
We hate admitting another guy has a sexier body than ours.

Not all of us are as confident as the men in movies.

Don't assume that we can handle ourselves with the dignity and strength the same way that famous and attractive men do.

If you're around us, we don't mind if you comment on another guy's looks.

We already know that you think he's attractive, so don't try and deny it.
We can tell that you think another guy is hot.
You don't hide it as well as you think.
We're not nearly as stupid as you think.
We can see the way you look at him.

We realize he has a hot body, and we know you think that.
We're fine with that. 

It's when you become an adoring fangirl obsessed with him that we start to feel worse.

For some of you, doesn't it hurt when you're hanging out with a guy, and he'll start talking about another girl?
Commenting on breast size or their thin-ness, and you feel like you're less than her?

We know that it bothers you.
Lots of us, including me, try to avoid constantly talking about another pretty girl we've seen when we're in the presence of another girl, be it friend or girlfriend.
We know it makes you upset.
We don't like making you upset.

So why do the same to us?

Lots of guys won't admit that most of this post is true.
I think that most guys would prefer not to even think about what I've written.

But I guarantee a good portion of guys feel this way.
We're not all confident.
A majority of us really are unhappy with the way we look.

Please, don't rub it in.
Like I said before.
It's okay if you admit another guy is hot.
Just don't go into details and start naming off how sexy he is and how he's super-hot.

We'd appreciate it a lot.
We try our best not to make you upset, so please return the favor (:


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I always kind of say what my goal of my post was.
I would say that the goal of this one was to write an interesting post.
To show that we guys aren't nearly as confident as we look.

That we're upset a lot.
Like I always say, I hope this changed someone's mind or at least affected them.

It's common sense to me, but I realize not everyone thinks the way I do.

Guys, it's alright to admit you don't like your body. It's fine. You don't have to have Taylor Lautner's body to be attractive.

Girls, we're not that confident all the time. Try not to rub it in our face when you find another guy hot.

Yeah.
That's my blog for the day (:

2,421 words.
Huh.
Not too bad.
Not too long.
Not too short.

Pretty good length for a post, I suppose.

Don't forget!!!!
If you like this, share it with your friends!!

Use any of the little 'share' buttons underneath the post!
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Thank you (:

Have a good rest of the day!

Bye bye!

-Nolan


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Top Five Songs of the Day

1. Dance Floor Anthem by Good Charlotte
2. Knockout by Lil Wayne ft. Nicki Minaj (Had this song stuck in my head).
3. Just a Dream by Nelly
4. Shots by LMFAO
5. Laid To REst by Lamb of GodYout

Song Lyric of the Day

~When i walk in the club

All eyes on me

Im with the party rock crew

All drinks are free

We like ciroc

We love patron

we came to party rock

Everybody its on

Let's go

Shots shots shots shots shots shots

shots shots shots shots shots

shots shots shots shots shots

everybody (x2) ~

-Shots by LMFAO

Video Game of the Day

Hexen II. 

Winning.

Youtube Video of the Day

Bahaha.

Picture(s) of the Day