A Day In the Life of Nolan: Life Tries To Take You Down.. Don't Give It The Satisfaction! Stand Up!

Let's see.
I'm..
How am I feeling today?

I'm not quite sure.
Honestly, I'm feeling a massive collection of emotions right now.
Confusion, depression, excitement, happiness, anger, self-loathing, optimism, dread, pain, interest, hope, fear, fearlessness, inspiration..

I'm not just saying that or making that up. I.. I'm actually feeling all of those at once.
Isn't that fascinating? I mean, really. Think about it. The ability to feel positive and negative emotions at once.
That's so amazing to me! It just... Leaves me in awe.
Anyway.
Back to... Whatever the hell I'll be talking about.

Let's see here....
I was listening to "Not Afraid" by Eminem this morning.
It's interesting.. I was.. I guess that's what gave me the 'inspired' emotion.
I want to feel that way. I want to be that strong, that confident.

Hmm..
I feel like I want to talk about something like this!
I think I'll try!

So bear with me on this.. I have absolutely no clue what I'm even going to say.
At all. No ideas. At all. Whatsoever.

SO!
Let's try it.

Also, random side note. In my Sociology class, we're watching that video about men's self-image in society.
The man that's.. Narrating? Talking? Not sure.
Anyway. He said that it takes guts to stand up and support women and their right to be equal to men.
I.. I don't think it takes that much.. I do it naturally. Why wouldn't you support women? I mean really.
There's no reason not to support them. Back to my rambling.

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The future is absolutely terrifying.
Isn't it? It's unknown. We have no clue what's going to happen. We could die in less than 12 hours.
We could also find the happiest thing in the world in 12 hours.
We could meet our soul mate, we might already know our soul mate.
You might be with your soul mate and you don't know it!
You might be with your soul mate and you do know it.

The future... God. It scares me.
So much. I have to be honest and decide it's just plain.. Yeah.. I just get scared easily.
I get scared very easily. And.. The future is.. I don't know. To me, it's so stressful.
I really do not like change. And the future is all about change.
So logically, I don't like the future!
I get stressed out when I think about what I'm going to be going through.

My undergrad is the next 3 years of my life. 3 years of tests, exams, essays, presentation, research..
It's a lot. It's what I'm going through right now, and I can't say I'm looking forward to it.
If you're in high school, then high school is the next few years of your life.
Doesn't high school suck? Yes. It does.
That's a rhetorical question.
I strongly disliked high school. It was... Not a good time for me. At all.
And after high school, you have to decide about college, about what you want to start doing in life.
It's hard to look forward to something like that, isn't it?

Yeah, the future is stressful.
There's so much that is scary, that's unknown.

But...
I can do it. You can do it.

I don't know why I'm in this mood! I guess listening to Not Afraid really.. Inspired me.
I want to feel that way. I want to be that strong, I want to be confident, I want to look at the future, and say COME AT ME BRO.
That's so hard though. That's hard to put up with.. That's a hard goal.

But I'm pretty sure I can do it.
I mean, it's scary. I really am terrified. I'm not a strong person. I'm really not.
But I want to be that strong.

You know what? I think I can do this. I think I can be stronger.
And guess what? You can too. You can make it through this shit.
Life sucks, high school sucks, people are stupid, the world is brutal, society is out to get you.
Yeah, they all don't like us. They revel in our despair. They love seeing us feel pain, they love it when we fall apart.
Don't give them that satisfaction!

It's asking a lot to say "suck it up", so I'm not going to say that. Because, let's face it.. You can't just do that.
It's hard to sit down and say, "I don't think I'm going to feel pain today! I'm going to be happy constantly."
I know some people who can do that, and it makes me kind of jealous.
Wouldn't it be awesome if you just.. Wouldn't feel pain?
That'd be amazing. Anyway.

Don't give the world that satisfaction!
The world is stupid, they're out to get us.
Yeah, it's annoying as hell, and it hurts when they come after you and tear you apart. It's brutal!
We're constantly being torn down. We're constantly being told we're not enough, we're being reminded that we aren't needed, aren't wanted. This little part kind of sounds like part of this blog about society and how it sucks.
That blog was fun to write.. I suggest you read it. It was interesting.

Shrug it off. That's so easy to just say. Easier said than done. It takes a lot more than just thought power to "shrug it off".
The world will get you down, it will run you over, it will curbstomp you, and it won't stop until you're broken and bleeding.
It will try to kill you.

But you know what?
You've been through hell.
Yes, I mean you.

You're still here, aren't you? You're alive, you're breathing.
You have scars. You have cuts, burns, scratches.. You've been through so much.
You have scars. Mental, emotional, physical scars.
You're covered in proof that you've been through more than most people.
You've been through things that no one should have to deal with.
All those scars.. They remind you what you've been through.
You can still remember why they're there.

That scar on your arm? It's from the day they called you stupid, because they made fun of you.
That bruise? It's from someone you love abusing you.
That brand? It's because someone you love left you for another person.
That cigarette burn? It's because they called you a whore, a slut, useless, weak.
That cut? It's because you couldn't deal with the pain anymore, because you needed a release.

You're underweight, you barely eat. Why? They called you fat.
You hide your emotions behind a wall. Why? They told you showing your pain was weakness.
You keep smiling. Why? If you don't smile, the tears will flow down your cheeks.
You can't trust anyone. Why? Someone you love lied to you, hurt you, and you don't want that again.
Every night, you drink until you can't feel anything. Why? You're too tired of the world, you need an escape.

You're tired of this. You're tired of getting ripped apart, for no reason.
Did you deserve any of this?

NO.

You don't deserve ANY of this pain, any of this shit.
Yet you go through it every day.

But you know what?
You're alive. You're breathing. You keep going.
You keep pushing through. No matter what happens, something keeps you moving.
You may have no idea why.
You might wonder why you even bother trying anymore.
Some mysterious force, some inner fire, some strength inside you is constantly pushing you!

Yes.. You're tired. You're exhausted.
Just.. Going through your day makes you tired. Just keeping a smile on your face requires so much effort.
Believe me...
I know you're tired.
I know it's so hard to keep going some days.

But you can DO THIS.
Okay?
You can keep going.
You can move forward.
You've already been through so much!
You've already been through hell, and you came out alive!
You made it through, but you were hurt.
You have proof that you're strong.

That scar on your arm? It's healed. You stood up for yourself, they don't dare touch you now.
That bruise? You were abused, but it made you all the more stronger it takes more to hurt you now.
That brand? They left you, but you're living just fine without them.
That cigarette burn? They called you names, but you told them you were tired of their shit.
That cut? It gave you short term release, but you're ashamed of it. You aren't going to let it happen again.

Whatever doesn't kill you, makes you stronger.
That doesn't feel true, but it is.
All those cuts and scars? It just means you got in a fight with yourself. You WON. You still are breathing.
Trust me on this.. I know the feeling of cutting. The mental need to hurt yourself.
This blog talks about this in detail.. Read it. Please.

Yeah, people give you shit.
Yeah, they make fun of you, they call you names.
Weak.
Pathetic.
Fat.
Freak.
Useless.
Stupid.

But they don't know you. They don't know anything about you.
They have no idea what you're going through.
You've been through things that would have killed them.

They call you weak? You're alive even after the world tried to take you down.
They call you pathetic? They don't know what you deal with when you go home, when you're alone.
They call you fat? You constantly diet, you work out, you skip meals just so you can feel better.
They call you a freak? Those scars don't define you. They show where you've been, what's happened.
They call you useless? You've helped your friends smile when you couldn't even smile, you've saved a life.
They call you stupid? You know more about emotions and stress than they ever will.

The world will constantly give you shit!
You won't be able to go a day without people trying to hurt you.
Yes, it's terrible. It's not fun.
It's the sad truth.

But.. You know what?
Let them.
They can try and take you down, they can try to kill you.
But you won't let them.
You have a burning will to live.
You fall apart. You feel pain. There are days when it all seems like it's too much.

But you keep moving forward, you put one foot in front of the other.
There are days when you just are trying to keep going.
It's exhausting just to step forward.

Crawl before you can walk. Walk before you can run.
So?
RUN.
Don't let life get you down.
Run forward. Break through barriers. Slam through those walls that are slowing you down.
People try to take you down? Shake them off.
When bullets start flying, run through the gunfire. You're bulletproof.
The hell you've gone through has strengthened you beyond what people can even imagine.

If they hate you, if they don't accept you?
They can feel however the hell they want. It's not your decision if they like you.
You can't decide for them.
Let them hate, let them try to break you down.
But they can't.
They're little pests. You're stronger than that. They can't rip you apart. You won't let them.
Sounds silly, but...
Haters gonna hate!
Don't let it hit you hard. They can't do shit to you. You've been through everything, and they're not strong enough to kill you. Nobody is.

Don't be afraid.
Yes, the future is terrifying.
It's unknown.

But you can still do it.
You can still move through this.
You're strong enough.
You've already been through it all.
So why stop now?
Live for today.

Let your loved ones know you love them.
Remind them you care.
Life is too short to hate. Love people, make friends, encourage others.

This life may suck, it may get you down, it may try to kill you..
But it's worth it.

You can always do this.
There are days when you feel like you can't handle it..
Those days, take a break. The world will keep turning.

People give you shit? Flip them off, walk away.
You feel like crying? Go home, curl up with some music, cry your eyes out.
One of your friends is depressed? Drive to their house, bring them candy, give them hugs.
You're tired of people? Lock yourself in a room with a computer. Watch funny Youtube videos, watch TV, make yourself laugh.

This world is brutal, it's going to try and kill you.
It's terrible.
It hurts.
But you've been through enough already.
Don't let the world break you down.

You're strong enough to move past it.

This life is short, live it up.
You only get one try, so make it count.
: )

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Well, that's my blog.
I got a little emotional on this one...
I really did. I got pissed, I got emotional, I got inspired, I got pumped up...
Yeah.

I really hope you guys enjoyed reading it!

Remember to read these other blogs if you liked this one.

She Deserves Your Best

YOU Define Who You Are

Life Is Rough.. Hang In There

Don't Let Anyone Else Tell You Differently.. You Are Beautiful

Remember, share this post if you like it!
And leave a comment.. I love reading comments!

Thanks for reading everybody. I hope this post helped someone feel a little better, or encouraged you!

-Nolan

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Top Five Songs of the Day

Not Afraid by Eminem
Drop The World ft. Eminem by Lil Wayne
Surfacing by Slipknot
All Star by Smashmouth
Lovers In Japan [Osaka Sun Mix] by Coldplay

Song Lyric of the Day

~Well the years start coming and they don't stop coming
Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running
Didn't make sense not to live for fun
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb

So much to do so much to see
So what's wrong with taking the back streets
You'll never know if you don't go
You'll never shine if you don't glow

Hey now you're an All Star get your game on, go play
Hey now you're a Rock Star get the show on get paid
And all that glitters is gold
Only shooting stars break the mold!~

-All Star by Smashmouth

Video Game of the Day

Chess. That's right, chess.
Nah. Not chess.
I was going to say Borderlands.

Youtube Video of the Day